Most of us have a vague idea of what we value—honesty, creativity, family—but we rarely use those values as active filters for our choices. “The Values Filter” argues that your core values should be the primary criteria for every “Yes” or “No” in your life. When you lack a clear filter, you become vulnerable to the agendas of others. By defining your non-negotiables, you turn abstract beliefs into a practical shield that protects your time, your energy, and your integrity.
The Cost of Congruence
Living out of alignment with your values is the primary cause of internal friction. If you value “Health” but spend your evenings eating fast food, or if you value “Creativity” but spend your days on repetitive admin work, you will feel a persistent sense of unease. This isn’t a lack of discipline; it’s a lack of congruence. Using a values filter means being willing to pay the price—sometimes turning down a profitable opportunity or an easy path—to maintain your internal peace.
Three Steps to Build Your Values Filter:
- Define Your “Vital Few”:
- List ten things you care about, then ruthlessly cut them down to three. These are your “Vital Few.” Why only three? Because if everything is a priority, nothing is. Common examples include Autonomy, Mastery, Contribution, or Resilience.
- The “Filter Test” for Opportunities:
- Before accepting a new project, client, or habit, run it through your Vital Few. Ask: “Does this action actively serve [Value 1], [Value 2], and [Value 3]?” If it clashes with even one, it requires a serious justification or a firm “No.”
- Values-Based Time Blocking:
- Look at your calendar for the past week. How many hours were dedicated to your Vital Few? If your values aren’t reflected in your schedule, they aren’t actually your values—they are just aspirations. Start blocking time for the things you claim to care about most.
The Integrity Edge
People who use a values filter are not just more fulfilled; they are more respected. They possess a quiet confidence that comes from knowing exactly who they are and what they stand for. Your values are not just a list on a wall; they are the boundary lines of your life. When you respect your own boundaries, the world begins to respect them too.
What’s Coming Next…
In our next installment, “The North Star Goal,” we’ll explore how to bridge the gap between your abstract values and your concrete, long-term ambitions.
